Lies and Jokes
by Awkward Oregonian
Summary: 18 year old Mabel and Dipper Pines return to Gravity Falls once more, before their adult lives really begin. Dipper knows something is really wrong this year, but will Mabel notice, before a certain isosceles monster gets exactly what he wants?
1. The Return to Gravity Falls

A young woman pressed her face against the window of a bus as it zoomed into town. It had been an entire year since Mystery Twins had returned to Gravity Falls. They had been sent to help out their Grunkle Stan nearly every summer for the past six years. It seemed like only yesterday the two were preteens on their first trip up to spend the summer in Oregon. The brunette gazed dreamily out the window, remembering the past with fondness. She was remembering all of the fun times she had with her brother and all of the attempts at an epic summer romance. (Which never ended the way she hoped.)

"Earth to Mabel!" Dipper repeated for the 3rd time, waving a hand in front of his sister's face. "We have to get off the bus now or else who knows where we'll end up?" With a soft sigh and a deep breath, Mabel smiled to her brother and finally joined him in exiting the bus.

"You've been spacing out the whole ride up here. Did you even sleep last night?" Dipper questioned as the two walked toward the Mystery Shack. "No way Dip! I was waaaaaay too excited to sleep!" Their conversation was cut short as soon as they stepped inside the gift shop. "Hey dudes!" Soos greeted the twins with a toothy grin, while in the process of clocking out. "I thought you two would be here… uh sooner? Anyway, I'm headin' home. See you dudes tomorrow!" the larger man said as he headed out the door.

"Looks like it's just gonna be you, me, and Grunkle Stan tonight!" Mabel grinned at her not so little brother. "Speaking of Stan…" Dipper pondered aloud while briefly scanning the gift shop for their great uncle. "Hey, what's that?" He motioned toward a note on the counter. Snatching the paper from the counter, Mabel began to read in the best narrator voice she could muster, "Pizza's in the fridge, I'll be up some time tomorrow morning. Mabel, you're on cash register duty. (Don't think I won't notice if a bill or two are gone.) Dipper, you'll be helping me with everything else. When I say helping, I mean you will be doing all of the work, while I tell you that you're doing it wrong. Don't stay up too late. Welcome back."

There was a long pause before the twins broke into laughing fits. "Same old Grunkle Stan!" Dipper exclaimed while wiping away newly formed tears.  
>"Do you wanna eat some dinner and then maybe head to bed~?" Mabel asked in a familiar tune that would later be stuck in bother of their heads. "Sounds good to me!" Dipper smiled and rolled his eyes.<p>

Though the twins were definitely adults now, they still wanted to share their old bedroom. Life was sure to catch up to them sooner or later and after this summer, Dipper would be going to college. Mabel wasn't sure if she wanted to or not, but she had the whole summer to make up her mind. Right now, it was all about the Mystery Twins spending yet another summer in the Mystery Shack.

"Good night Dipping Sauce!" Mabel called from across the room, exhaustion finally winning the battle. "Night Mabes!" Dipper responded, laying his head down peacefully. The room was quiet and still for a moment or two as the pair slowly slipped into unconsciousness.  
><em>"Sweet dreams~"<em>


	2. Stick in the Mud

The next day started pretty slow. Mabel was stationed at the register, while Soos and Dipper fixed up the shack. Stan was outside instructing them on how NOT to fix the roof's tiles. The indoor brunette sighed happily, her fingers lightly tracing over carvings on the edge of the desk. She figured Wendy had been the one to leave them from when she was still working the register. There was a little pine tree, a question mark, a heart, a llama, something that looked sort of like a star, and a few other tiny images carved into the desk. They all seemed somewhat familiar, but Mabel Pines didn't have time to think too deeply about them, before a bus full of tourists pulled up into the driveway.

As the hoard of people followed Mr. Mystery through the building, the young woman straightened herself up. _'Who knows? I might just meet the man of my dreams this summer.' _Mabel thought to herself, trying to quietly hold in her excitement at the notion of a real summer romance. Her right hand went back to the edge of the desk to carelessly trace over the symbols once more, but to her surprise, they were… not exactly gone, but the carvings were completely different. After a moment of confusion, Mabel shrugged and let it go.

Slightly odd things started to happen for the next week or so. They weren't completely distracting, at least, not at first. The carvings on the desk would change every now and then, there was a soft voice calling Mabel's name in the mornings and evenings, and the light bulb would dim nearly every time she took a shower, only to start working again, when she was out. After nearly two weeks of these little interruptions, Mabel finally brought it up to Dipper. Her brother tried to assure her that it wasn't serious and he lent her Journal #3 as a way to satisfy her curiosity.  
>Mabel skimmed through the pages, more entertained by the illustrations. She cringed slightly at the pages dedicated to the gnomes. Just as she was about to give up, something caught her eye. There was what looked like a wheel of some sort. It contained the same images that had appeared on the desk in the gift shop from time to time. Then she realized whom the pages were dedicated to. "Bill Cipher?" Mabel pondered aloud.<p>

The world's color began to drain, the lights dimmed, and life itself seemed to pause entirely. The brunette was unnerved, sitting in the best defensive position she could think of. She knew he was there, why else would everything feel so off? A sensation of familiarity washed over Mabel at the realization that, she had felt this way when the light in the bathroom dimmed during her showers. '_I think I'm gonna be sick.'_ Mabel thought to herself, trying not to imagine the worst.

_"Well, well, well, if it isn't the Shooting Star herself! Did you miss me?"_ The familiar demonic triangle asked, sounding smug as ever. _"Admit it! You missed me~!"_ Bill hadn't changed a bit since the day the twins had first met him, but this time, Mabel was on her own. "Why would I miss a crazed geometric entity like you?" She questioned. _"I'd be offended, if it weren't for the fact that you've expanded your vocabulary."_ The demon appeared next to the young lady, who had now retreated to Sweater Town. 'He can't hurt me. Dipper will come get me.' She thought in a slight panic, not realizing the creature was so close. Suddenly, Mabel's entire body stiffened as a small black hand gently rubbed her back. _"You know he can't find you in here, right?"_ The demon asked, practically mocking her previous thoughts.

_"Besides, I didn't come here to hurt you or anything like that."_ Something about his tone made the girl peak over the rim of her sweater. "Why were you making all of that cryptic stuff happen then?" asked a muffled Mabel._ "I was bored and you are amusing to me, Star."_ If the demon had a visible mouth, a smirk would be ever present as he smoothly talked the human into a false sense of security. "So you wanted someone to talk to? Why not Dipper?" Mabel asked skeptically. "He's one for intelligent conversation." She added in one of the cheesiest posh accents to ever exist. _"Star, no offense, but Pine Tree is more of a stick in the mud."_ At that, the woman grinned. "He can be a bit of a stiff, but his bark is worse than his bite." Bill was caught off guard and started to laugh. _"He was a bit of a sapling when he was younger but…"_ "He matures as he gets molder!" Mabel finished for him, having fully returned from Sweater Town with a suitcase full of smiles.

After the two had joked around and chatted for a while, the isosceles monster looked down to where a watch should've been. _"Well, it's been a blast, but it looks like your break is just about over."_ He sounded rather disappointed, but he made a good point. _"It's been fun, Shooting Star! See ya later!"_ Before Mabel could even respond, she woke with a start from her bed. _'That was pretty fun!'_ the woman thought with a warm feeling inside. She felt like she had just met a great new friend. "Hey Mabel, Grunkle Stan says your break is over." Dipper stated, trudging into the room. "What happened to you?" Mabel asked with a hint of amusement in her voice. "Let's just say you might want to watch out for a trail of mud on the stairs…" With little to no warning, Mabel burst out into laughter. "What's so funny?" Her brother questioned, sounding both confused and annoyed. "Oh just an inside joke~!" Mabel replied as she headed out the door.


	3. Lunch with a Side of Interrogation

Dipper noticed that something seemed off about Mabel. She was in a way better mood than usual, which was great, but something felt wrong. He had found her napping during her breaks, which wasn't necessarily odd. She seemed to sleep so peacefully; ever since the day he had tracked mud into the shack. Dipper had even noticed Mabel giggling in her sleep, which, once again, wasn't that odd. It was how often Mabel would laugh or giggle at something and claim it was an inside joke.  
>The woman hadn't been out of the Shack since they arrived and with nearly 4 weeks without outside contact, the "inside joke" excuse seemed more and more suspicious.<p>

"Hey Mabel?" Dipper started, while sitting down to lunch with his sister at the diner. "Hm?" Mabel responded softly, gazing out the window in what looked like a daydream. "Mabel!" The older twin snapped out of her trance like state. "Y-yeah? What's up?" She finally responded, sheepishly. "Is there something wrong?" Dipper asked, concern obvious from his tone. "Of course not, silly!" It sounded like Mabel was fighting to remain alert. "You keep spacing out and stuff. It's almost like when you meet a guy you- Oh… Oh! You like a guy huh?" Dipper came to his own conclusions, which weren't entirely wrong.

"Uh what? There's no way I-I could have those kinds of feelings for him…?" Mabel attempted to defend herself, but it came off as more of a question than a statement. "So you do have someone you like?!" Dipper was obvious with his surprise. "I mean, you don't even go out that much, besides the forest and- wait… Are you thinking of getting back with Jeff?" Mabel's face was slightly pink with rage. "I would never get with him!" The younger twin held up his hands in defense. "Okay! Okay! I get it! Yeesh… So, if not him, who? Do I know him?" Mabel's slightly pink face when to a slightly brighter shade and she looked away out of embarrassment. "Yeah, you know him." Now he was getting somewhere! "You gonna tell me who my twin sister has googly eyes for or?" There was a shift in her posture. "I've got a better idea, he'll tell you himself!" The brunette huffed with slight aggravation.

The twins finally got to order and ate their meals in near silence. _'You want me to tell him I've been hanging out with you?'_ Bill's voice bounced through her mind. _'Well, he'll only hear "some evil demon plotting to hurt MY sister" if I tell him.'_ She thought in response. _'Good point. Good point.'_ Bill pondered a way to keep both twins oblivious to the plan he had set in motion. _'I've got something that might just work. Then Pine Tree won't be worried and you and I can keep spending time together.'_ Mabel smiled slightly. The thought that a once enemy was willing to do whatever it took to keep a friend, made her heart beat a little quicker.

The demonic gentleman's schemes were going better than he could've ever dreamed. Shooting Star was falling for even the smallest gestures of kindness. Soon, she would be his to control. Not just for the destruction of the Pines family, but for everyone who would dare oppose him. Mabel was just a human, but she was caring, quirky, and charismatic to a level Bill hadn't seen in a long time. With her under his command, he could win over just about everyone. Mabel would be his ace, his lady luck, and his star- no… His Shooting Star! The demon laughed with delight, only pausing to glance at Dipper. _'Now… What am I gonna do with you~?'_ Bill asked himself silently. _'Oh! I have just the thing~!'_


	4. Deception and Memories

After lunch, the twins returned to their posts at the Mystery Shack. Mabel was back on register, a little frazzled, but still a ball of sunshine. Dipper, however, was extremely concerned. _'Someone we know… but who?_' the younger twin contemplated. _'If it's not Jeff, then it can't be Gideon. Mermando is taken. That weird boy band is off running around the forest. Robby is still with Tambry.'_ He thought it over many times, thinking of everyone who they both had interacted with. After their shifts had ended, Dipper opted out of dinner. He had to figure this out. In typical Dipper Pines fashion, he made a chart and started crossing out the impossibilities.

After going over the list for the fifth time, the young man noticed something was off. There was an extra space available for a name. Before Dipper could stop himself, he was dozing off. Darkness was replaced with a soft grey replica of the room he had just been in. A sudden realization hit the man. "Bill." Dipper's calm demeanor switched to a mix of fear and rage. _"Hey there, Pine Tree! Did you miss me~?" _Began the insane dream demon, taking form in front of him. "Who in their right mind would miss you?!" Dipper growled, quickly calming himself. "No one has time for you, Bill." _"That's not what your sister said last night~!" _Bill knew exactly which buttons to push and man was this kid easy to predict.

"W-what?!" The male's complexion grew pale, hoping that the monster was only trying to get a reaction. _"You heard me, Pine Tree. Your sister can't help herself around me, though I don't blame her."_ The floating triangle attempted a wink. _"Shooting Star loves spending all of her free time in my domain,"_ he continued. _"I'm sure you've heard her whimpering while dreaming." _Dipper thought he was going to puke from this. _"I will say, it's fun to get her like that. She just takes everything I dish out and wants more of it."_ The implications alone were putting images into the man's mind. There's no way his sweet, innocent sister would fall head over heels for this beast.

_"What's wrong Pine Tree? Don't trust me? How about I show you instead?" _With that, the scenery changed. Dipper was looking at what appeared to be a memory of Mabel's. She was cheerfully chatting with that disgusting demon. He always seemed to have at least one hand on her at all times. At first it was on Mabel's shoulder, then her back. Mabel's bubbly tone had gone to something more lustful and Dipper knew where this was going. He forced himself to look away and covered his ears. _'This CANNOT be real!_' He internally screamed, attempting to drown out this perversion. _"Oh it's real, kid. And I haven't even taken a human form for her yet. Can you just imagine the things that will happen to little Shooting Star when the big bad demon can really-"_ "ENOUGH!" Dipper all but screamed. "You aren't getting anywhere near Mabel again, you sick fuck!"

Everything was falling right into place. _"Oh I doubt that very much. In fact, I think I'll pay her a little visit soon. She's gotta be lonely without me inside her… mind." _Bill's tone concerned Dipper to say the least, but before he could respond, the dream demon was gone. The younger twin shot up from his nightmare, only to find Mabel asleep in her bed. He glanced at the clock to notice it was 4:00am. They would have to wake up in an hour or two anyway, so Dipper opted out of waking his sleeping sister. The events of that night flashed through his mind while he listened to his sister's soft snoring. _'How much of that was real?'_ He thought to himself, while trying to determine if he should tell his sister about the dream. Quickly deciding against it, the younger Pines twin shifted onto his side. Once comfortable, Dipper drifted into a dreamless sleep.


	5. A Challenger Appears

"BUT I CAN'T STOP STARING IN THOSE EVIL EYE-" Tranquil sleep was interrupted by the blaring alarm on Mabel's phone. An audible groan was heard from Dipper's side of the room. "You know, I could just stay in the other room if my music bothers you so much." Mabel faked a pout and chucked a pillow at her twin.  
>The morning went on slowly. Dipper debated asking Mabel about the memory he saw, but wasn't sure how to bring it up without startling her. In the off chance that his sister wasn't involved with Bill, Dipper would be upsetting her for no reason. On the other hand, Mabel would be in some serious danger if that impossible freak were to have his way.<p>

"You alright there Dip?" Mabel asked with a lopsided smile. Dipper was in one of those focus trances again. _'Hopefully nothing went bad with Bill last night…' _She thought, while shaking her head. She wasn't going to kid herself and assume the two sat down to a lovely garden party while settling their differences. _'I'll have to ask Bill about it later.' _Mabel wandered down stairs and got ready for opening. Bus after bus of tourists arrived, though they didn't stay for too long. She tended to a few customers and made sure they left with a smile. Dipper had also set off to work, replacing the aged signs he had hung outside.  
>The lunch and dinner hours were really slow, thanks to there being so many families with small children. However, it was now an hour till closing and the crowds had mostly dissipated back into their swanky hotels. Dipper had been tasked with getting the ingredients for dinner tonight and Soos had to be driven to the hospital, thanks to an electrical incident. So, it was up to Mabel to finish up the next hour on her own. Currently, there was a family of four looking at matching shirts and much to the cashier's amusement, the children were arguing over which designs to get.<p>

The spectacle held her gaze for a moment longer, before a young man clearing his throat shook her free. "Oh! Hey there!" Mabel tried to collect herself, while taking in the man's appearance. He had well groomed, deep brown locks and soft golden eyes. _"Hey there yourself~!"_ Something seemed familiar, but the woman couldn't put her finger on it. He was quite dapper to be certain. His honey yellow vest and light yellow dress shirt where both well fitted. The points of contrast being his black slacks and dress shoes. "Where are you going all dressed up like that?" Mabel asked in a playfully flirty tone. _"To meet the girl of my dreams!"_ He responded after quickly looking her over. "I-Uh what?" She stammered, backing up a little bit. _"I've had my eye on you for a long time, Ms. Pines."_

With this, Mabel's face was bright red. "I'm sorry, but I already have someone-" "_In mind?"_ The brunette man finished her sentence, tapping his right temple with a wink and a smirk. A moment passed and the woman's brilliant brown eyes grew wide with excitement. "B-Bill?!" The man nodded. "Oh my gosh! What happened to-you made a deal to get that huh?" Mabel's elated expression shifted into a weary one. "_Wow Star! You catch on fast!"_ Bill laughed. _"But before you ask, I already clarified the situation with my host here. He's completely okay with me borrowing his body… indefinitely." _

After a bit of catching up, Mabel heard the familiar screeching from the tires of Dipper's car. "Looks like it's time to start closing up shop!" She cheered and started reorganizing the mess left behind by today's gift shop visitors. _"Mind if I lend a hand?"_ Bill asked after already beginning to rearrange the shirts in their proper order. Dipper was heard walking in through the front door. _'Perfect~!'_ Bill thought, getting ever closer to the unsuspecting girl. _"Would you mind if I came back by tomorrow?" _The possessed man cooed in Mabel's ear. "Are you kidding?! I'd love that!" She spun around to face him and was caught up in a big bear hug. Just then, Dipper walked into the room. His sister was in some stranger's arms and she was giving him the warmest smile he had seen in months.

The embrace was cut short when the younger twin cleared his throat. _"Oh! I'm terribly sorry, sir!" _Bill was always at his best when his pawns were in place. _"You see, Ms. Pines and I were just testing to see if a man of my caliber could do heavy lifting!"_ "HEY!" Mabel laughed and punching the man in his left arm. "And who exactly are YOU?" Dipper seemed less than amused by the situation_. "Wilson! Robert Wilson to be precise."_ The demonic gentleman turned to the young woman. _"I'll take my leave, but remember, I'll be watching~!"_ He pulled out his cellphone, waving with it as he showed himself out.


	6. Something Borrowed

As Mabel prepared dinner for three, Dipper silently watched from the kitchen's entryway. "How long do you plan to stare at me like a creeper?" She questioned while finishing up the beef stew she had be asked to prepare. "How long is it going to take for your little boyfriend to come talk to me?" Dipper knew he wouldn't be getting any answers out of her. "When he feels like it, I guess?" There was much unease with this response, though it could've been, because of Mabel's sweater sleeves attempting to unite with an open flame.  
>There wasn't much point in Dipper's inquisition, though there was rarely much of a point to anything Dipper did anymore. He supposed he'd just have to wait and see which loser his goofball of a sister was falling for this time. There was absolutely no way this mystery guy could be Bill. Not with how happy Mabel was. That thing only brought about great misfortune wherever it was summoned.<br>"Hey kids!" Greeted Grunkle Stan, as he finally reentered the shack. "How's Soos holding up?" Mabel asked, as she had been concerned for quite some time. "Oh he'll be fine. Glad I don't have to cover his heath insurance!" The old man laughed, joining his niece in the kitchen. Both twins rolled their eyes, but were relieved to know their long-term friend was well on his way to recovery.

Once the stew was done, Mabel served up dinner and the three adults ate in a blissful silence. Dipper was especially hungry and helped himself to three servings, before Mabel had to remind him that their dinner was also their breakfast and lunch. Stan had mentioned his new favorite soap opera was going to be on that night, so the twins decided to spend their evening upstairs.  
>Despite the amount of time that passed, the siblings still shared their love for mini golf. They built yet another in-room course to play through and enjoyed an evening of friendly competition.<br>When it was time for bed, Mabel had suggested playing a soft soundtrack of tranquil noises she had "borrowed" from the gift shop. Gentle sounds of waves along the coast and rather tame seagulls lulled the two to sleep.  
>Mabel found herself in a dream of what she imagined was to be the Oregon coast. <em>"Fancy seeing you here."<em> called a familiar voice as she turned to face the water. A man with dirty blonde hair and amber eyes greeted. "Hey Bill!" Mabel grinned wide at her good friend. _"Hey there Shooting Star." _He chuckled and took his place beside the human. "It's been so long since I've seen a beach like this…" Mabel commented, letting herself topple over onto the sand, pulling the demon down with her._ "Haha! Yeah, it really is something to behold huh?" _"I wish we could really go to the coast." The woman whined, letting herself sprawl out on the ground. _"What's stopping us? I could easily take you there while you're awake, if you'd like." _Mabel perked up at this. "Really?!" She was so easily impressed, that the demon had to suppress a laugh. _"Of course I can~! I have a body now and you've got a day off coming up, right?"_ A big smile spread across her face, only faltering for a moment. "I don't think I brought a swim suit…" _"You won't really need one. The water is pretty cold and I doubt you'd want to be fully exposed to it."_ The demon explained. _"There are lots of places to go and things to do besides swimming in freezing water." _Unsure of what to say, Mabel simply nodded and enjoyed the rays of the setting sun. Bill smiled down at his unsuspecting prey. _'All I need to do is get Shooting Star alone. She's so trusting and open minded, that she'll cling onto my every word as law. Set it up like a date and Star's as good as mine.'_ On the other side of the room, Dipper was having a less than pleasant night.


	7. A Change of Plans

It all began with the sight of Mabel and the obvious human version of Bill playing around in the sand of some beach. "Mabel!" Dipper tried to call out to his sister, but it was obvious she could neither hear nor see him. The demon was throwing every bit of charm he had at the woman. With a sigh of defeat, Dipper slouched down against a tree, trying to avoid the sight of his sister being… happy. She looked genuinely happy with that monster_. 'Why aren't we enough to keep her smiling?'_ The man wondered as he thought over every detail of their past encounters with the notorious Bill Cipher._ 'He does have the power to make her happy, but he's still a selfish prick. The only reason he pretends to like someone is if they have something he wants...' _

A new question flew through Dipper's mind. _'If this is Bill, then who was that guy getting all grabby with Mabel?!' _In typical Dipper Pines fashion, he began to devise a plan. One that would keep that batshit insane creature away from his sister and hopefully make her even happier. It was going to take some teamwork, but that wouldn't be too hard to accomplish. A lot of people loved Mabel for her positive demeanor. Even Pacifica had taken a liking to her after they panned things out. _'This could really work!' _However, the young man's pleased expression soon turned into a cringe as he noticed the human Bill working his way closer to removing Mabel's sweater. _'This better work.'_

A cool gust of wind blew through the coast and carried some sand straight into Dipper's eyes. Working quickly to rid himself of the stinging sensation, he hadn't noticed the change in atmosphere. _"Hey Pine Tree, enjoying the view I see~!"_

With a groan, Dipper snapped back into reality. The evil triangle was less than pleased to lose his chance to torment the twerp a bit more, but he was glad to see his plan moving along smoothly. _'Stupid kid doesn't even realize that he's going to seal his sister's fate. Pine Tree is as brainless as ever!' _


	8. Made of Money

Nearly sliding down the stairs, Mabel Pines made her way down to start up breakfast. She had overslept by about 25 minutes and hadn't even undone her now messy braid from the night before. "Sorry I'm la-" "It's fine, I covered for you." Dipper was sitting at the table with Grunkle Stan. "His cooking ain't half bad." The older man grumbled, eating the last bite of his scrambled eggs. "Try not to incinerate them next time." An uncomfortable chuckle came out of Dipper's mouth. "Cut me some slack, old man." Trying not to blurt out something that might bruise her brother's fragile ego, Mabel took her seat at the table. She examined the eggs thoughtfully, before taking a bite. "I see you tried to _spice_ things up a bit!" Dipper had finally taken her advice about avoiding bland ingredients.

After breakfast, everyone set off on their morning routine to get ready for the day. Dipper had just finished brushing his teeth when he accidentally walked in on his sister changing. Red faced, he tried to back out of the room unnoticed, but it was too late for him. "Get your tush in here and help me pick out my outfit!" Skirts and shorts were lined up, as well as tank tops, shirts, dress, and sweaters. _'Of course she'd still insist on wearing something warm on a hot day.' _Dipper thought while rolling his eyes. The woman held up options for her judge on her bed to evaluate. "What about this one?" One thumb down. "Okay… what about the pink skirt?" Two thumbs down.

_'This is my chance. Keep it together, man.'_ Dipper's face grew serious. "Mabel?" The response was only a nod. "What are your thoughts on that Wilson guy?" "You mean Bobby?" Mabel asked casually. "Yeah, him. What do you think of him? I mean, I saw your "discreet" texting last night during dinner and before bed..." He turned to face a wall as Mabel changed into a soft teal mini dress, complimented by a plum cardigan. The messy braid from before had been undone to reveal gentle waves. "I was that obvious huh?" Silence filled the room for a few moments. Dipper knew what this meant. His sister was getting dressed up, because that Wilson guy was coming back. "P-Pretty much." He managed to choke out.

Dipper finished getting ready, after Mabel had slipped on her flats and headed down to the gift shop. "Hey kid!" Grunkle Stan called to Dipper once he had returned to the ground floor. "What is it now?" The young man sighed loudly. "Come take a look at this!" The old man pointed through a window in the gift shop to what appeared to be Mabel chatting with Robert Wilson. "It's ten minutes till opening and she's already flirting with some stranger." Grunkle Stan's eyes were now trained on the taller figure. "That's just Robert Wilson." "How much could that twerp be making?" The old man wondered aloud, while sizing the man up. It was time for Dipper to set his plan into action. "Wilson actually makes some pretty good money." He shrugged and continued. "If he wanted to, he could probably buy any business in town." As if on cue, Grunkle Stan's vision went green. "You said his name was Wilson, right?" Before Dipper could respond, Stan was already opening the door and injecting himself into the available space.

Mabel had been talking with the possessed man for about fifteen minutes already and hadn't realized how close it was to opening. "Mabel, why didn't you tell me you were friends with such a dapper gentleman?" Her eyes widened with embarrassment. "H-hey Grunkle Stan! How long have you been standing there?" Bill was also a little thrown off by the interruption, but refused to let it show. He was a master of the mind after all. Without missing a beat, the young man turned to Stan and bowed slightly. _"I don't believe I've had the pleasure of meeting you before, sir."_ Stanford gave him a questionable look. "Save it, kid. Are you interested in taking my niece on a date or what?" A little stunned by the forwardness of the question, Bill meekly nodded. "That'll be about $72.50 for the day. Will you be paying cash or charge?" _"Cash?"_ Bill seemed to ask more than answer, but Stan took it as a green light. "I'll ring you up then!" Stan dragged the couple into the gift shop and he took his place, expectantly behind the counter. "Remember, we put the fun in _"No refunds."_" Bill ended up giving Stan $80.00, because Stan refused to give him his change.


End file.
